Definition of Abuse

Abuse is about Power and Control

It is about one person trying to control and have power over another.

It can be emotional, financial, psychological, sexual, or physical, and the harm it causes can last a lifetime.

The abuser accomplishes this by the inducement of fear.

How To Recognize Abuse in a Relationship

If you answer yes to any of the questions below, you could be in an abusive relationship, or your relationship could become abusive.

• Does he/she repeatedly and wrongly accuse you of seeing other people?
• Does he/she tell you that if you changed, he/she wouldn't abuse you?
• Does his/her jealousy stop you from seeing friends or family?
• Does he/she make you feel like you are wrong, stupid, crazy, or inadequate?
• Has he/she ever scared you with violence or threatening behaviour?

• Do you often do things to please him/her, rather than to please yourself?
• Does he/she prevent you from going out or doing things you want to do?
• Do you feel that, with him/her, nothing you do is ever good enough?
• Does he/she say that they will kill or hurt themselves if you break up with them?
• Does he/she make excuses for their abusive behaviour by saying it's because of alcohol or drugs or because they can't control their temper, or that they were "just joking?"

• You should feel loved and respected in a relationship...YOUR feelings are also important!

Never Let The Hand You Hold.....Hold You Down"                      There is Help...don't be aftraid, ashamed or embarrassed to ask for help! You are NOT to blame: Your partner may be angry or under stress but these are not excuses for violence. It is not your fault. You are NOT the only one: Abuse happens to many women of all ages, religions, cultural backgrounds, and incomes. Nobody has the right to hurt you: Although people may tell you that it is your duty to obey your partner and stay with him/her, all forms of abuse is wrong. It usually will NOT get better:  Partners who are violent, usually do not change. The abuse may get worse over time. Call Bernadette McCann House 24 hr. helpline: 1-800-267-4930 or 613-732-3131 and you will be directly connected to a worker. All calls are confidential and we do Not subscribe to call display.